Youth sports have always been about more than just winning. They're about teamwork, learning discipline, building resilience, and—above all—having fun. But in recent years, a growing number of young athletes are feeling burned out, anxious, or emotionally overwhelmed, even before they reach high school.
This raises an important question: Are we doing enough to support the mental wellness of our young athletes?
For too long, mental health has been the invisible opponent on the field. But today, coaches, parents, and sports organizations are waking up to the reality that emotional well-being is just as vital as physical strength. In this blog, we’ll explore the role of coaches and parents in protecting and nurturing the mental wellness of young athletes—and how doing so can lead to better performance, healthier kids, and a lifelong love of the game.
The Pressure Is Real
Many adults think of youth sports as low-stakes fun. But to a young athlete, the pressure to perform can feel overwhelming.
Whether it’s:
· Trying to earn a starting position,
· Living up to a coach’s expectations,
· Impressing parents in the stands,
· Or securing a future scholarship...
...these pressures can create anxiety, self-doubt, and a fear of failure that takes the joy out of the game.
According to a study by the American Academy of Pediatrics, nearly 70% of kids drop out of organized sports by age 13—citing pressure, lack of fun, and burnout as top reasons.
If we want to reverse that trend, we need to understand that mental wellness is performance-critical and should be treated with the same urgency as injury prevention or skill development.
Coaches: Build the Right Culture
As a coach, your influence goes far beyond X’s and O’s. You're often one of the most impactful adult figures in a young athlete's life. That makes your approach to mental wellness incredibly powerful.
Here’s how coaches can lead with empathy and intention:
✅ Emphasize Process Over Outcome
Celebrate effort, hustle, communication, and growth—not just wins or stats. This teaches kids to value progress over perfection.
✅ Normalize Emotions
Let players know it's okay to feel nervous, frustrated, or disappointed. Create a team culture where emotions are discussed, not dismissed.
✅ Be Mindful with Language
Avoid phrases like “Man up,” “Don’t be soft,” or “You’re playing scared.” These feed stigma and can shut kids down emotionally. Instead, try:
· “What are you feeling right now?”
· “Let’s reset and breathe.”
· “You’ve got this—mistakes are part of the game.”
✅ Make Space for Fun
Even in competitive environments, leave room for light moments. Games, team-building activities, music during warmups—these small things build morale and mental resilience.
✅ Watch for Warning Signs
Mental fatigue, sudden drops in performance, emotional outbursts, or withdrawal could indicate a deeper issue. Take the time to check in with your players—not just as athletes, but as people.
Parents: Support Without Pressure
Parents often mean well, but even subtle forms of pressure can weigh heavily on young athletes.
❌ Phrases to Avoid:
· “You have to perform if you want to go D1.”
· “I didn’t drive all this way for you to strike out.”
· “You weren’t trying hard enough.”
These comments, even when unintentional, turn sports into a performance review instead of an opportunity to grow.
✅ What to Say Instead:
· “I love watching you play.”
· “Did you have fun out there?”
· “What did you learn today?”
Be your child’s biggest fan, not their toughest critic. Their coach handles the training; your job is to provide unconditional emotional support.
🔑 Also important:
· Respect rest. Don’t push for year-round play unless your child wants it.
· Encourage other interests. Let your child explore music, art, or other sports.
· Model mental health. Talk openly about emotions and healthy coping strategies at home.
Creating Mentally Safe Spaces
Whether it’s the field, the dugout, or the car ride home, kids need environments where they feel emotionally safe.
Ask yourself:
· Can my athlete express how they feel without judgment?
· Is failure seen as a normal part of development?
· Do adults around them communicate in ways that build up rather than tear down?
You don’t need to be a licensed therapist to support mental wellness. You just need to be present, aware, and intentional.
Recognize the Warning Signs
Both coaches and parents should keep an eye out for red flags that could indicate a child is struggling emotionally:
· Sudden lack of interest in sports
· Irritability or emotional outbursts
· Trouble sleeping or eating
· Negative self-talk ("I'm terrible," "I can't do anything right")
· Isolation from teammates or family
If you notice these signs, it’s okay to ask questions and, if needed, seek help from a school counselor, pediatrician, or mental health professional. Early intervention can make a huge difference.
Mental Skills Training Isn’t Just for Pros
Mental wellness isn’t just about fixing problems—it’s also about building strength. Just like we train muscles, we can train the mind.
Consider introducing:
· Mindfulness or breathing exercises before games
· Visualization: Have athletes picture success or walk through tough moments mentally
· Positive self-talk: Teach players to recognize and replace negative thoughts
· Journaling: A great tool for reflecting on performance and setting goals
Programs like these can be implemented at any level—from tee-ball to high school varsity. You don’t need a sports psychologist to start integrating basic mental skills into your team culture or home routine.
The Role of Sports Organizations
Leagues and clubs have a responsibility to create policies and environments that prioritize wellness:
· Offer training for coaches on youth mental health
· Enforce boundaries on scheduling and play volume
· Make mental health resources available to families
· Create codes of conduct that promote respect and emotional safety
When the system supports wellness, everyone wins—players, families, and the future of the sport itself.
Redefining Success in Youth Sports
What if we redefined success in youth sports as:
"Raising athletes who grow in character, love the game, and stay mentally and physically healthy."
Too often, we focus on external markers: trophies, scholarships, rankings. But in reality, a child who walks away from a sports experience with confidence, friendships, and a healthy relationship with competition is far more likely to succeed in life—on and off the field.
Conclusion: Play Happy, Stay Happy
Mental wellness in youth sports isn't a luxury—it's a necessity. It’s what keeps kids playing, growing, and loving the game for years to come.
Coaches and parents are the front line. With empathy, awareness, and intentional support, we can make sure every child who steps on the field feels safe, seen, and supported—not just as an athlete, but as a person.
Because in the end, the best kind of player is a happy player. And a happy player is one who’s built to last.
Extra Resources:
· 📘 “The Whole-Brain Child” by Daniel J. Siegel & Tina Payne Bryson
· 🧠 HeadStrong: Mental Health & Sports (Podcast)
· 🏅 Positive Coaching Alliance (www.positivecoach.org)
· 💬 Child Mind Institute – Sports & Mental Health (www.childmind.org)
Ready to gear up?
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